Inbox: My Cousin, The Queen of Many Names 

Dear Jessica, what would you look like as a japanese animation, and can you draw a dragon, also can you draw a comic about an annoying person who calls her cousin the queen of england? whatever, Carl McKyye

It's strange, Carl McKyye, that if I rearrange the letters of your name, it spells... I AM LORD VOLDERMORT

Oh wait, it doesn't spell that. It spells Kyle (and your secret last name), meaning that you are my cousin and that you did it in the library with the candlestick holder.

Of course you could have just called me to ask your questions, but e-mailing me is way cooler as it allows me to answer you in front of the global community known as "the world":

Unsurprisingly, I would look awesome as a Japanese animation. Just picture Trinity from The Matrix but way cooler and more cartoonish. And less black leather and more white clothes. And long brown hair. And smarter. And hanging around with hot people all the time. That's one awesome animation.

I can draw a dragon. I can also draw comics. They are really good with stick figures and stuff. How's the mother country? I'm going to ask your Dad to send me a photo of you in your crown for all to see. You can't prevent him from sending it because you are still a minor and therefore bow to me. (And him too. Sometimes.)

Side Note to the World: I like to call Kyle "The Queen of England" because he's 10 and it annoys him. Plus, it's better than his posting alias "BenCarl."

Related Photo: BenCarl's Stab at Revenge (Featuring Me)

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