And Back Again 

I spoke on the phone with a notable producer yesterday (regardingTSL).

Three films he produced appear on my favorites page on this site.

Three stories that have had great influence over me, one of which I held tight to throughout my childhood.

I immediately liked him.

He has a history of involvement in epic mythology, modern mythology, comparative religion and fighting for a good story. He took a few risks. It seems he has ethics.

We talked about TSL, then he said that they were only looking for horror and thriller. "Movies like Saw."

I paused. “Are you sure?” I asked, “I mean, I just want to be clear: You understand that I’m not interested in the company or development money from the company, but more so your independent involvement. You, yourself, are only interested in doing horror?”

“And thriller,” he said a little to quickly. And then there was a pause.

“Horror and thriller…” I repeated, disbelieving. Disappointed. “Are you sure?”

But by then it was too late:

My hand was on curtain’s edge, I was peering through,

And I could see the wizard was tired and resigned to the industry and wanted nothing to do with anything that would eventually have studio involvement.

Because that would mean going to war.

He’d fought the good fight long ago. And regardless of what anyone thinks,

I think he won.

So we talked about the state of big-budget film for a few moments, and I expressed my discontent with studio films.

Granted, thriller can mean more The Constant Gardener than Along Came a Spider. It could mean a lot...

But he used ‘Saw’ as an example…

He’s already been down the rabbit hole and back. He helped changed the studio system before I was born, made sure that he produced film stories that were artistic and good and that mattered...

Stories that shaped who I am.

Yep, he won.

And he probably was wounded quite a few times along the way. That, is inevitable. There’s no fight left in him. I understand.

I hung up the phone and realized that I was doing the sort of thinking I myself abhor. Much like studios look for yesterday’s hit instead of tomorrow’s more difficult, timely gem, I was looking to someone who had already done their part instead of he or she who has yet, and who is ready, to do.

And that’s why we shouldn't concern ourselves with the wizard, gents.

Because he can’t help you: You’ve had the power all along.

Of course, I suppose it is the going that's important,

But I’d have liked to have saved myself the time and idealism.

Funny thing about journeys: They change you.

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