Spent 

Yesterday I spent over eight hours at Will Rogers Beach. It was chill, overcast… lovely, if you ask me. (California sunshine is so abundant that I rejoice over a cooler, cloudier day.) During those hours I played dodgeball, capture the flag and many similar games. I also went for a swim in the ocean. It was a full day of throwing, kicking, sprinting in sand, swimming, dodging, defending…

On the drive home I knew I’d be sore today. I hit the door exhausted. With my last dregs of energy I de-sanded myself in the shower, rinsed out my bathing suit and rash guard in the sink, ordered some Italian take-out, ate and finished reading Shadowmancer (that book is not really worth mentioning). I then watched one episode of Law & Order: SVU and fell asleep at 9:30 PM.

Lately, I have had trouble falling asleep before 2 AM, so it was excellent to go to bed early and sleep deeply. I woke today with all my muscles hurting. It was the kind of even, light pain that stiffens your walk but feels good because you know that you are alive and putting your body to good use. Lately, I have also felt disappointed in myself for not getting out on the field more, so this soreness is an excellent feeling as well. Perhaps this is the way that humans are meant to live?

Few things can compare to an athlete’s high. (Being on stage is one of those things.) Everyone playing in the games yesterday was athletic and so the level of play was challenging. I was particularly impressed by some of the other girls who were playing. I had forgotten how much I adore that athletic moment when your body is in full motion. It is a slightly different kind of “in the moment” than the theatrical sense of the phrase. This is the “in the moment” where you don’t have to think, but instead rely on your muscle memory and impulses to guide you through a full range of physical motion. Every muscle in your body harmonizes and, in that moment, you are capable of great things.

I should mention that I am a huge fan of participating in team sports. And I love playing dodgeball. If dodgeball were an Olympic sport, I would definitely tryout for the U.S. team. (I’ve been preserving my amateur status in case such an occasion arises.) Some of you may perhaps be looking at my pictures and thinking, “This little actor girl? She can’t play.” You are not the first to view me in this way. In fact, I think I’ve come to use others’ underestimation of my abilities to my advantage. I assure you that I could kick your ass at any sport and that’s not me talking trash. That’s me prophesizing the truth. (So bring it.)

I wish I would come home spent in some manner, (physically, emotionally, intellectually…) every day. Knowing that I’d hit the sports rush. Knowing that I’d completed physical and/or intellectual tasks. Knowing that I worked so hard on something I enjoyed that I had barely enough energy to prepare to crash into bed. Knowing that I’d used a good part, if not all, of my potential and energy… That is a simple, great feeling that everyone should feel more often.

From now until the day I die, I am going to make an effort to go home spent as often as possible.

PS: Someone should really start a Community Advanced PE class of some sort. I’d definitely go that, man. Definitely.

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